I must be too annoying 4 u.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
