i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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