hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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