So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize