Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
