Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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