I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
