What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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