I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Randomize
