even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
3pm strippers are depressing
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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