Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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