For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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