im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
