So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
