i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
