Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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