just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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