i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
