I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
