we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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