dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
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