if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
