I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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