Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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