I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize