Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
