I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
