So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize
