My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
