so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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