Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
They are going to name an STD after you.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
