I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
