absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
