I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
