i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
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