I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
