dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
