Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
