She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
