love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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