it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
