I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
There's always time for handjobs
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
