There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
