So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
