One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
