come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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