508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
