i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
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