I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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