i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
